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A guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that this is a very talented octopus.

He can play any musical instrument in the world.

He hears everyone in the crowd laughing at him, calling him an idiot, etc., so he says that he will wager $50 to anyone who has an instrument that the octopus can't play.

A guy walks up to the bar with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus.

The octopus picks up the guitar and starts playing better than Jimmy Hendrix, just rippin' it up. So the man pays his $50.

Another guy walks up with a trumpet. The octopus plays the trumpet better than Dizzie Gillespie. So the man pays his $50.

A Scotsman walks up to the bar with a set of bagpipes. He sits them down beside the octopus. The octopus fumbles with it for a while and sits it down with a confused look on his face.

"Ha!" the Scotsman says. "Ye canna' play it, can ye?"

The octopus looks up at the Scotsman and says, "Play it? I'm going to shag it as soon as I can figure how to get its pyjamas off."

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