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First Blonde Joke

On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to economy since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York, and I'm not moving."

Not wanting to argue with a customer the flight attendant asked the co-pilot to speak with her. He went to talk with the woman asking her to please move out of the first class section. Again, the blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York, and I'm not moving."

The co-pilot returned to the cockpit and asked the captain what he should do. The captain said, "I'm married to a blonde, and I know how to handle this." He went to the first class section and whispered in the strawberry blonde's ear. She immediately jumped up and ran to the economy section , mumbling to herself, "Why didn't anyone just say so."

Surprised, the flight attendant and the co-pilot asked what he said to her that finally convinced her to move from her seat. He said, "I told her the first class section wasn't going to New York."

Second Blonde Joke

A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over and asks her if she would like to play a game to make the time go by faster. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun.

He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice versa." Again she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.

The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!" figuring that since she's a blonde (and assuming all the stories are true) that he will easily win. This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, she agrees to the game.

The lawyer asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5, and hands it to the lawyer. Now it's her turn. She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four? "

The lawyer gives her a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the internet and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he e-mails all his co-workers and friends, all to no avail. After over an hour, he wakes the blonde and hands her $50. The blonde graciously takes the $50 and turns away to resume her nap.

The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes her up again and asks, "Well, so what IS the answer?! "Without a word, she reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.

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